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Wednesday, July 16, 2014

Wonderous Walkin' Wednesdays

As I've been walking/jogging around my neighborhood in the mornings I see other people out too.  Usually I try to at least say, "Good Morning!" as I am trying to make friends in my neighborhood.  I would be ecstatic, actually, to have a walking partner in the morning.   I see a lot of dog walkers out.  I cannot help but melt at their little puppy faces and talk in little baby voices about how cute their dog is. I don't think I am making a good impression with the dog owners though. This morning I was running down a hill and one of the dog walker's dogs got very excited and she had to get him to heel. As I was running I told her, "Aww, it's so cute how he's excited by just my footsteps!"

When I looked up at her though she had desperate, crazy eyes. "Please, don't!  He's a puppy and I'm trying to train him."

Oh man. And I ruined it. Well that's me. I'm Jen, Supervillain Extraordinaire, foiling your dog training plans with my talkative nonsense! 

My friend Kenny is good at training dogs.  Maybe he can train Crazy Eyes's dog and she won't be so paranoid about making conversation with her own neighbors while trying to walk her dog. I had to pass Crazy Eyes on the way back from the mid-point of my walk and I made sure not to make eye-contact.

It has been difficult to make friends in my new neighborhood. Sometimes I still feel like a kid on the playground with nobody to play with.  That is the worst feeling. I always had someone to play with except for one day in fifth grade when my best friend Lorrie and I were pretending to fight and I did not get a back up person to play with so I just walked along the playground all forlorn.  That was a really bad idea.

You know what else is a really bad idea? Pretending to sprain your ankle in gym class to get out of running your morning mile. I did that in ninth grade.  I always thought running the track was so boring and uninspiring.  At least if we were on a trail I would feel like we were exploring nature, but going around in circles felt dull and meaningless.  

So one day I was fed up with our daily mile run and pretended to fall down and hurt myself so I could stop.  I had turned my ankle, but not bad enough to really stop what I was doing and fall down. This was a really bad idea because I had to keep up with the lie all throughout that week at school. I refused to give in and this meant I had to walk with a limp around school for a few days and that I was not allowed to do things I enjoyed doing in gym class during free time, like jump rope.

I want to try to do that Chicken Fat workout. You know, the Apple commercial with the "Go, you chicken fat, go!" jingle. There's actually a whole workout routine in the lyrics of the song and I think that would be fun to try. 

Now if you will excuse me I need to see if there are other people's days I can ruin just by making conversation.

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